Help Heal My Marriage - 16. Go All In
Daniel Crosby • February 10, 2025
16. Go All In
One of the most challenging things I see in my office with couples is a hesitancy to really go all-in on their marriage.
If your marriage has gone through some difficulty lately, it’s hard to be all-in. We’re fearful and we want to protect ourselves from being hurt even more.
Staying limbo doesn’t make for a good relationship. A contractor wouldn’t start building you a house until you’re all in and have signed the contract. A doctor won’t operate until you’re signed the paperwork saying you agree to the procedure.
So how can you go all in? Here are 3 ideas:
1. Recognize the risks –
Let’s apply some logic to this and admit that it could crash and burn. Just say that aloud! Now, write down worst case scenario and tell yourself what you would do if that happened. Chances are this is not a life ending decision to go all-in.
2. Clearly communicate deal breakers –
Don’t tolerate the intolerable. If there’s a deal breaking behavior occurring, then break the deal. If an affair happens again, and again, and again, it’s probably time to stop kicking the can down the road and hit the eject button.
3. Choose to see the good –
I know there WAS hurt in the past, but I want you to try to see the possible good in the future that will only come with being all-in. Is the good, good enough to justify taking the risk of going all-in.
It’s Go Time:
If you’re still wavering on going all-in, there may be more going on beneath the surface. Go talk to a good pastor or counselor who can help you dig and give you a different perspective on why you’re struggling to take that big step IN or OUT.
Every day I help hurting frazzled people by walking with them as they get back on the path toward becoming who God created them to be. Shoot me an email if there’s anything I can do to help you or someone you know. daniel@danielcrosbycounseling.com
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