60 Second Marriage Recap - Love is a Choice
Daniel Crosby • February 7, 2025
15. Love is a Choice
Our culture has distorted the idea of LOVE. How’s that for directness?
Hollywood’s idea of love…Tik Tok’s idea of love…Our neighbor’s idea of love…
So what is love anyway?!
Love is the choice to seek only the best. It’s not just a feeling in the moment. It’s not just a logical thought either. It’s all of it wrapped up together.
Jesus said, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”
See where he said it takes the “heart, soul, and mind?” That’s complex!
This means that I should seek the best relationship with God, the best relationship with others, and the best relationship with myself.
Sometimes choosing what is best turns out to be what is the most difficult.
So what can help us choose love? Here are 3 ideas from Robert Sternberg, a psychologist that studied love.
1. Intimacy – Do you have fun together? Would you rather spend the day with your spouse or with anyone but your spouse? Do you play, tease, joke, talk, and dream together? Can you have conversations about hard things?
2. Passion – How’s your sex life? Is it growing and deepening or is it on the back burner and just a chore to check off the list? Do you kiss? Do you really kiss, like more than a peck on the cheek while walking out the door? Do you admire your spouse. Do you check them out when they walk away? Do you hug long and often?
3. Commitment – How strong is your trust in your marriage? Do you feel secure? Can you talk to your spouse about it if you don’t feel secure? Do you believe that you’d stay married even through a miscarriage, a life changing medical crisis, financial ruin, or an affair?
It’s Go Time:
Are your answers mostly positive to the above or do you need to get to work and begin making your love foundation a bit more solid? Maybe talk to your spouse about these big 3. Maybe call and set up an appointment with a counselor.
Every day I help hurting frazzled people by walking with them as they get back on the path toward becoming who God created them to be. Shoot me an email if there’s anything I can do to help you or someone you know. daniel@danielcrosbycounseling.com

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