"When to Walk Away" Book Review
Daniel Crosby • October 2, 2024
“When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic People” by Gary Thomas is a book for those who subscribe to the Christian faith and want some good pastoral biblical advice about dealing with those nutty people out there who can’t seem to respect boundaries.
Thomas tells story after story that will normalize a lot of the things you feel in some of your relationships. Sometimes toxic people can be so difficult they begin to make us wonder if we’re going crazy. You’ll hear some stories in this book and think, “Whew, I’m glad I’m not the only one that feels this way.”
A big premise of the book is helping us find peace in letting go of toxic people and walking away. This doesn’t make us quitters. This doesn’t mean we hate the person who we walk away from. This means that we begin to see the immense value of our own time, energy and efforts, and we make the decision to pivot and pour ourselves into people who do want to connect, engage, and build us up as we in turn, build them up.
Whether you have a difficult spouse, coworker, sibling, child, or friend, you’re going to get sound biblical and practical advice from Gary Thomas in his book “When to Walk Away: Finding Freedom from Toxic People.”
Look for beautiful things when you're restless, uncomfortable, or on edge. There's something about acknowledging the good around us that helps us reset and realize that it's not all bad. If you're struggling to see beautiful things in the world, come see me and we can talk more about it. www.danielcrosbycounseling.com
“The Needs of the Heart” by Chip Dodd is a book that will blow your mind. When I picked it up, it’s a very small thin book. Less than 100 pages. I assumed I’d breeze through it in a couple of hours. About a month later I finished digesting it. The truth is we cannot fully live the life God has called us to unless we acknowledge that we do have needs, that these needs are good, and discover the healthy ways of meeting these needs. Chip takes common human needs like Security and Accomplishment and he unpacks what they really are pointing us to in his typical concise but brilliant depth. There’s no fluff here. With chapters just 3-4 pages each, you’re going to want to have a highlighter ready to underline, to ponder these topics, and maybe then to discuss them with someone you know and trust. You’ll come away from this book with a deeper sense what is already fulfilled within you and ones that might be lacking where you need to go do a deep dive with a lot of prayer and introspection. If you liked Chip’s book “The Voice of the Heart,” this is one is your next read. Go grab “The Needs of the Heart” by Chip Dodd.
Two ways a counselor might help you get uncomfortable and grow: 1. Systematic Desensitization is progressively working your way up to do harder things until you reach your goal and the hard things don't feel as hard anymore. 2. Flooding is when you conquer the struggle by going all in and confronting it head on. It's like teaching someone to swim by throwing them in the deep end of the pool. Could these things help you overcome some complacency? Come see me and we can talk more about it. www.danielcrosbycounseling.com
